“You are the universe, expressing itself as a human for a
little while.” ~ Eckhart Tolle
Pause to consider this quote, and we may begin
to understand the mystery of our existence.
This quote reminds us that the universe, and
everything in it—including ourselves—is connected.
Just as the universe expresses itself in, say, a tree
or an animal, it also expresses itself in you and me—in human beings. We
are connected to that tree and we are connected to various animals, yet
what differentiates us from them—making us truly unique—is our abundant
intellectual capacities. We are, perhaps, the only form on earth that can
create, appreciate, be aware, be grateful, communicate with words, relate, hope
and laugh on a highly functional level. We are also the only creatures
who are fully aware of the dimension of time—yet we rarely pause to consider this.
“A little while,” in Eckhart Tolle’s quote, defines our
existence or, as The Buddha puts it: “The trouble is you think you have
time”. We profoundly think that our 80 or 90 years on this earth are lengthy.
Therefore, we go on putting off nearly everything in our life.
But, have you ever thought that the earth is more than four
billion years old—and it’s still a living planet? Do you know that the oldest
tree is around 9.500 years old?
Compare our age to the planet’s age, or to the oldest trees
on earth, and you will realize that our lives are no longer than the blink
of an eye in the span of the universe.
Despite this obvious truth, our race is still not aware of
the enormity of its problems. And on top of the list comes the problem of
wanting to inherit the earth—permanently.
PERMANENCE.
Human beings became so engrossed in living
life that they forgot to see the endings in it. We consider weddings, for
instance, as a part of our life’s cycle, but funerals are unfathomable.
Death, which is the most pivotal cycle in our existence, is
the cycle most denied. It will happen to everyone and everything around us,
even the chair you are now sitting on and the screen you are looking at will
cease to exist. But we always choose to look at the beginnings and deny the endings.
We choose to look at one side of the cycle, the side which gives us the
illusion of permanence.
Everything we do in our life is unconsciously done for the
favor of sticking there forever. Whether it’s the career we pursue or the house
we spend on building for 20 years and end up living in for only 10, it’s all
for the sake of staying.
Every day, every single second, something is happening to
remind us of how flimsy our existence is. The neighbor that was diagnosed by
cancer, the friend of an acquaintance who died in an accident, the war that
suddenly arose in a certain country, the tsunami that damaged the shores of an
area, the plane that crashed killing everyone on board, are we seeing this?
We probably see it and recognize it; but only shortly. As we
open our eyes to another day, we forget the gentle reminder that the universe
has sent us and lose the moment of consciousness that we gained upon learning
the news.
Death doesn’t have to be the only reminder. There’s an ending
to everything we are experiencing in this life span. The job you are now in
might not be the same in four years. The partner you are now with might not be
the one you will sleep next to when you are in your seventies. Even the person
you are now looking at in the mirror won’t be the same after a month, or a
year.
POWER.
All of the problems that our world faces are because of
the love of power. All the genocides, the wars, the break-ups, the fights;
they’re all resulting from the human mind. We are just not aware of the
capability of this mind and of the ego that is occupying our self.
If we scrutinize our daily life, we can in fact spot this ego
of ours that hides behind our real identity. Although the masses would deny
this, we love to control others. It gives us some form of identity; one that
elevates our ego to a great extent.
The most romantic relationships in the world have been
destroyed because of power. The closest families have been torn apart and the
oldest friendships have come to an end. Have we ever watched ourselves when a
discussion takes place? We try our best to prove our point of view, no matter
how much aversion we have to the discussed matter or subject.
All we unconsciously care about is being right.
Next time you’re sitting with a group of people and you have
this urge to dominate in the conversation, just remember that the people you
are trying to have mastery over share the same energy as you. Therefore,
by dominating them, you are technically dominating yourself. Try to remember
the impermanence I just mentioned above and you will realize that the
discussion or the conversation that is taking place will actually end. The next
morning no one will remember your words, unless they were dominating—then you
have created an enemy instead of an ally.
WORRY.
There is a beautiful speech for Mary Schmich where she
says: “Worrying is as effective as trying to solve an
algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.”
Worry is generated from fear and we, as human beings, spend
most of our life is that state. We fear losing someone we love, we fear losing
our job, we fear not becoming auspicious, we fear natural disasters, wars,
diseases and so on. As a result, we end up thinking, over-analyzing and trying
to speculate the future; we basically worry.
The capacity of a worried mind is immense. To put this into
the test, catch yourself when you’re worried about something and watch a movie.
Now as you’re watching and totally focused, think about your problem for a
couple of minutes. When you snap out of it, you will actually realize that you
missed a couple of scenes and you don’t really know what on earth the
movie is talking about anymore.
The movie is a tiny example of what we miss when we worry—the
sad part is that we miss much more during our day. And what we deny is that
worrying never solved anything. Only when we get what we want or when a problem
comes to an end, we chokingly claim: “Oh! My worry was really useless.”
But do we remember such incidents? Do we actually learn that
there is a certain flow that is taking place in our life and worrying won’t in any
way alter it? Again, we don’t. We keep falling in the trap of our mind who
feeds on fear and thought.
NON-ACCEPTANCE.
“Three hundred years ago in a small Japanese village, a beautiful young girl was pregnant. Her angry parents demanded to know who the father was. At first resistant to confess, the anxious and embarrassed girl finally pointed to Hakuin, the Zen master who lived near her parents’ food store. When the outraged parents confronted Hakuin with their daughter’s accusation, he simply replied ‘Is that so?’
When the child was born, the parents brought the little boy to Hakuin, who now was viewed as a pariah by the whole village. They demanded that he takes care of the child since it was his responsibility. ‘Is that so?’ Hakuin said calmly as he accepted the child.
A year later the young girl could stand it no longer. She told her parents the truth—that the real father of the child was a young man who worked in the fish market. The parents went to Hakuin to ask his forgiveness, to apologize at length, and to get the child back again. As Hakuin slowly placed the baby in the grandmother’s arms, all he said was: ‘Is that so?’”
This a very powerful Zen story that speaks about accepting whatever life throws at us. If we look around, we can actually see non-acceptance everywhere; and I’m not only referring to acceptance of situations.
Whether it’s about our looks, other people or circumstances, we are no longer satisfied by what is and what we are.
Let’s tackle first the non-acceptance of our looks. We are currently living in the century of plastic surgeries and fashion. It’s the century of human beings who need assent from the society they are living in. We want to fit in so badly that we forgot who we truly are.
Unfortunately, it’s the acceptance of others that we always seek, which leads to non-acceptance of ourselves.
And the greatest contradiction here is that we seek the acceptance of others but we don’t accept who they are. Whether they’re a family member, a friend, a co-worker, a lover or a neighbor, we always tend to alter the other person according to our own desires. We never accept the imperfection of others.
We have this perfect image of everyone we know and we expect them to act accordingly. And not only have we held this image on people, but on life itself. It’s sad to see how we still resist everything happening in the course of our lives.
We have great trouble accepting situations and outcomes.
Place yourself in the position of Hakuin, the Zen master. What we would most likely do is make a fuss. We would’ve tried really hard to prove them wrong and to remove ourselves from this hideous situation. We wouldn’t have accepted taking the child as our pride won’t let us take responsibility of something we are not responsible for in the first place. We would have had sleepless nights thinking how the universe could be so unfair.
But look at Hakuin, the Zen master. He saved himself trouble, insomnia and non-sense thinking. In conclusion, he believed in the results by simply accepting what life threw at him. Of course, we must deal with every situation we are faced with, but before dealing with it, let’s accept it first—this is when magic will take place.
JUDGING.
Most of the religious and spiritual systems advise their followers not to judge.
Dr. Wayne Dyer, a self-help author said, “When you judge another, you do not define them, but you define yourself.” Or, the bible in Mathew 7:1-2 ,“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”
We always enjoy reading those quotes and agreeing on them, but do we understand their meaning? Judging is the easiest thing the human mind can do. All it takes is having a look at a person or a situation and forming a specific, self-created opinion.
If we look the process of judging, we can figure out the reasons we judge and work on them.
Judging mostly occurs when we are sitting with others. Eleanor Roosevelt said, “Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.” The majority of people nowadays enjoy talking about other people: judge their lives, their bodies, their education, their marital status… and so on. Whether judging occurs when we are with others or when alone, the reasons are the same.
The main reason we judge is because we cannot properly asses what the person we are judging actually has. Whether we admit it or not, we want what we think they have. Therefore, as a way of letting off steam, we judge.
Another reason for judging is ignorance and misunderstanding. We quickly form an idea of a person we barely know or don’t know at all. It gives us satisfaction to believe that we can read through others.
Next time you’re about to judge someone, put yourself in their shoes and try to be conscious of the reasons behind your judgment. Realize that there is a sort of truth behind Mathew’s quote in the bible. Try to remember the situations when you were judged and the situations where you judged others. Link them together and you will know that “what goes around comes back around.”
Judging others isn’t the only issue here. We also tend to judge our life’s situations and what’s taking place in it. Labeling every condition and giving it an identity has become human beings’ favorite dramatic hobby. We have virtually made a room with lockers which have labels on top of them. If something unusual happens, we throw it in the bad locker. If something good happens, we place it in the good one.
We need to step out of this classification and stop judging whatever occurs in our lives.
Deepak Chopra mentions in one of his books that everyday when we wake up we should say, “Today I shall judge nothing that occurs.”
This is my daily Mantra. Judge nothing that occurs; let it be.
FEAR.
Last year I had a painting that I called “fear.” It consists of an old bearded man standing in the middle of the desert, with chains wrapping him from head to toe.
This is what fear does to us. It chains us and places us in an unknown deserted place. As long as fear is within us, time will fly by and we will grow old without ever accomplishing anything.
We are raised on fear, and the words “what if.” Fear has been in our psychological system since we were babies. As we grow older, it clings to us like a limpet.
If we closely examine our problems, we will realize that they are rooted in fear. We fear not succeeding, we fear change, we fear commitment, we fear enjoying ourselves, we fear letting go, we fear loving, we fear taking that job… etc. Every problem—whether tiny or grand—is generated from fear.
We identify with fear as it becomes an auspicious entity living in our system. We mistake it for who we truly are and go on doubting anything we are about to do. But the moment we realize that fear is not us, it is in us, our whole perspective will change.
There is a saying I repeat to myself whenever I fear doing something: “Fear is a liar.”
Just like the chained man I have painted, we likely look like him when we are in a state of fear. Without knowing it, we are chained and struggling.
Editor: Emily Bartran
This article can also be found on Elephant Journal.
